We have lost another too soon. On February 17, 2011 the world lost a wonderful person by the name of Perry Moore. He was only 39 and a force to be reckoned with when it came to pure honesty, creativity, love, and so many other things that this world needs more of. Perry's death comes soon after another Chanco family memeber. Katie-Fenton Vicellio took her own life on November 15th, 2010. She was an amazing young woman and is missed terribly. Katie V was only 29 years old.
This blog is difficult to write because I don't really know what to say. These two people meant a lot to so many people that the emotions of it all, well it's overwhelming at times. Sometimes I find myself drifting off into my memories to try and experience them again and remember the times when we were laughing, hugging, talking, just being together and enjoying life. Enjoying life....sometimes I forget.....I forget to enjoy the life that I have. I have said before that life gets in the way of having fun but we should all make our lives as fun and meaningful as we can. The loss of Katie and Perry makes me realize how little time we have here and that we should make it worthwhile. I realize that in my heart but it's hard to make my head realize that I need to live life in a meaningful way. What does that mean? What does it mean when people say live live to the fullest? Live life like there is no tomorrow? What does it all really mean? What I think it means is that we need to love in our lives, we need to show compassion, we need to experience new and wonderful things, we need to notice the beauty and ugliness that is around us, we need to not forget about where we come from, live a life you can be proud of, realize that what you do as a job does not define you as a person, we need to experience fear, sorrow, despair to realize how wonderful it is to experience bravery, happiness, and elation, and we need to have lasting friendships to share all of these things with.
Katie and Perry were people that inspired, loved, and experienced life. I am just lucky to say that they allowed me to be a part of that. You will both be missed more than you know. LOVE
Monday, February 21, 2011
Baby or Bust?
So the husband and I have talked about some things and we are putting off the move to Vegas in hopes of moving into the world of parenting. We all know that I am no spring chicken and that we both want to try for at least one baby. We have come to the conclusion that maybe we need to focus on getting prego. We have started the ball rolling for Ken to attend the Culinary Institute of Virginia and if everything works out he will be attending in April.
Some folks may think that having a baby is easy or that it is an easy decision but having a baby is scary. Exciting but scary at the same time. So many what if's come into play but I am trying to Let go and Let God. I can only do but so much so I am trying to not get so stressed about it. I am going to go with the flow and see where this decision takes us. Time will only tell at this point so wish us luck. I mean we haven't even started trying but it will happen soon......let's go BABY!!!!
Some folks may think that having a baby is easy or that it is an easy decision but having a baby is scary. Exciting but scary at the same time. So many what if's come into play but I am trying to Let go and Let God. I can only do but so much so I am trying to not get so stressed about it. I am going to go with the flow and see where this decision takes us. Time will only tell at this point so wish us luck. I mean we haven't even started trying but it will happen soon......let's go BABY!!!!
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Take a moment and be grateful
I am grateful for the way I was brought up and the life that I have now. I ask my students in ENG 110 (composition) to write a narrative essay about an event in their life that has changed them in some way. The things that some of them have experienced is astounding. I just read one where one of my students witnessed his mother being shot and killed by their father when he was very young. Another student grew up with two brothers and a single mom who raised them. She did everything she could to survive and that included selling drugs. She sold crack in NY and was able to provide a house and nice things for her sons until she got caught and was sent to jail. Another student was beaten up so bad she was in a coma. The man of her dreams was the one who was doing the beating. Another student lived in Liberia when she was young. Rebels invaded the country and she watched as they killed her brother and uncle. She then traveled across the country to live in a refugee camp for 5 years. Another student suffers from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder from being deployed 4 seperate times and lost so many friends while at war. Another student lost a child to sudden infant death syndrome and then lost her husband. The amazing stories are just beyond my comprehension.
I cannot even come close to understanding their experiences but I am appreciative to them for sharing their stories. Everyone has a story and everyone has their own triumphs over adversity and I am no one to say that one person struggled more than another but I will say that my students are individuals that are trying to improve themselves through education and opportunity. They have lived a life that many of us will never know and I believe that someone is raising them up to get over those obstables and memories that can destroy a person's spirit. They have shared their stories with me and I felt compelled to share them with you. There are people in my classroom that have endured immeasurable pain and evil yet they are still sitting in my classroom. Be grateful and humbled with the life you have and the blessings you have been given.
I cannot even come close to understanding their experiences but I am appreciative to them for sharing their stories. Everyone has a story and everyone has their own triumphs over adversity and I am no one to say that one person struggled more than another but I will say that my students are individuals that are trying to improve themselves through education and opportunity. They have lived a life that many of us will never know and I believe that someone is raising them up to get over those obstables and memories that can destroy a person's spirit. They have shared their stories with me and I felt compelled to share them with you. There are people in my classroom that have endured immeasurable pain and evil yet they are still sitting in my classroom. Be grateful and humbled with the life you have and the blessings you have been given.
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Vegas or Bust?????
Today I am thinking about the illegal practice of gambling in Virginia. Most of us have jobs that will always be normal or accepted by most people in society and accepted by our esteemed government. We are teachers, bankers, counselors, construction workers, restaurant workers, retail workers, etc. but what if there was a job you were great at and you really enjoyed but it was illegal. I am talking about gambling, I am not referring to dealing drugs or prostitution, but gambling. It is an industry that has helped the economy in many states yet it is not legal everywhere. You will obviously have your own opinion on casinos and gambling but I believe that it is a great industry that can help this state, along with others, in this economy.
With that being said, my husband and I are at a possible crossroads. My wonderful and loving husband is a card dealer. I don't need to go into specifics but he is good at what he does but there is a lot of stress and anxiety involved with this job. Not only for him but for others who are just trying to make money to support their families. The President stated that the state of the union is strong but for those people who struggle to support their families might disagree. None of use want to live pay day to pay day but most of us do. So you can judge if you want but the reality is there are a lot of games in the area and there is competition among houses and it is a problem. So the question remains, what do we do?
Another thing my wonderful and loving husband is great at is cooking. The man knows his way around the kitchen and he is truly talented with what he produces and creates. He finds joy in cooking for me and for others. Our friends can come over and know that they will have a fantastic dish that he has made. A friend of mine said once before that there are certain people that just know what works when it comes to taste and how a dish can be more delicious than you expect it. Ken has that gift. I believe he would excel at culinary school and that's what I want for him because he wants it. He has a passion for it and I am sure most of you know that when you find passion in something you should embrace it and never lose it. I want that for him because he deserves it.
So if we look at the two situations where would you end up? If you want to work in a place that has legal gambling so you don't have to worry about every damn thing and you want to pursue a culinary career, where do you go? You freakin go to Vegas. If you have not been to Vegas you might have a negative perception of what goes on there. My sister went for the first time recently and she was blown away with Vegas but before that she thought Vegas was mobsters and boobies (LOL you know you said it). Vegas is a premier destination for magnificent restaurants. We are going in May for our anniversary and we are planning out our eating schedule. It would be a great place for Ken to work and go to school. So is it Vegas or Bust???? I don't know but I am open to the possiblity. I do think it can happen and I do believe he would be an excellent chef. So why not? At least for a couple years?
People ask, well what about you? You just started teaching and you love it, you would lose your job. AH HA!!!! But I would not. I talked to my boss today and I would have the opportunity to teach fulltime...online. How is that for totally awesome?
Questions need to answered, things need to be looked at and figured out...but why not? Vegas or Bust?
With that being said, my husband and I are at a possible crossroads. My wonderful and loving husband is a card dealer. I don't need to go into specifics but he is good at what he does but there is a lot of stress and anxiety involved with this job. Not only for him but for others who are just trying to make money to support their families. The President stated that the state of the union is strong but for those people who struggle to support their families might disagree. None of use want to live pay day to pay day but most of us do. So you can judge if you want but the reality is there are a lot of games in the area and there is competition among houses and it is a problem. So the question remains, what do we do?
Another thing my wonderful and loving husband is great at is cooking. The man knows his way around the kitchen and he is truly talented with what he produces and creates. He finds joy in cooking for me and for others. Our friends can come over and know that they will have a fantastic dish that he has made. A friend of mine said once before that there are certain people that just know what works when it comes to taste and how a dish can be more delicious than you expect it. Ken has that gift. I believe he would excel at culinary school and that's what I want for him because he wants it. He has a passion for it and I am sure most of you know that when you find passion in something you should embrace it and never lose it. I want that for him because he deserves it.
So if we look at the two situations where would you end up? If you want to work in a place that has legal gambling so you don't have to worry about every damn thing and you want to pursue a culinary career, where do you go? You freakin go to Vegas. If you have not been to Vegas you might have a negative perception of what goes on there. My sister went for the first time recently and she was blown away with Vegas but before that she thought Vegas was mobsters and boobies (LOL you know you said it). Vegas is a premier destination for magnificent restaurants. We are going in May for our anniversary and we are planning out our eating schedule. It would be a great place for Ken to work and go to school. So is it Vegas or Bust???? I don't know but I am open to the possiblity. I do think it can happen and I do believe he would be an excellent chef. So why not? At least for a couple years?
People ask, well what about you? You just started teaching and you love it, you would lose your job. AH HA!!!! But I would not. I talked to my boss today and I would have the opportunity to teach fulltime...online. How is that for totally awesome?
Questions need to answered, things need to be looked at and figured out...but why not? Vegas or Bust?
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Friends
As I sit here doing a breathing treatment I have decided to reflect on the great friends that I have in my life. I admit that I don't always walk around thinking about how many wonderful friends I have but maybe I should. This past weekend was my 37th birthday. I have always said that if I don't throw myself a party who will, so with the help of my wonderful husband we planned a lovely evening of festivities. Not only was I celebrating a birthday but a close friend of mine, one of the best, was playing his last gig. He is moving to Colorado after being in Virginia for many many years. He is going through some life changing events and he is starting a new adventure. So we were all together this weekend having a wonderful time reflecting, laughing, and just being together.
You see we all kind of belong to this special group of friends because we have all experienced the same things, in the same place, and that makes us connected in ways that are hard to explain. There is a large span of years that we have known each other and there is certainly a bond. You can think of the Olympic rings. There might be seperate rings but they are all connected. We have experienced great joy such as graduating high school, graduation college, getting our first real jobs, quiting our first real jobs, meeting "the one", ok maybe he/she wasn't "the one", meeting the ONE, attending and being in each others weddings, sharing the joy of the first baby, the second baby. Along with the great joys come the great sorrows like being laid off, divorces from the ONE, custody battles, diagnosis of diseases, death and suicide. We have been through these life events together. Along with the celebrations come the defeat but we are there to join in, not matter what the circumstance.
I am not saying new people aren't accepted into this pool of friends but the love and respect we have among each other allows us to have a break in those rings for others to be a part of something so beautiful. I hope non of this sounds strange but friendship like the ones I am talking about are hard to explain. There is a quote I heard a long time ago and I can't remember who said it but it is "People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime." I truly believe this to be true. I am just blessed that the people in my life are here for a lifetime.
You see we all kind of belong to this special group of friends because we have all experienced the same things, in the same place, and that makes us connected in ways that are hard to explain. There is a large span of years that we have known each other and there is certainly a bond. You can think of the Olympic rings. There might be seperate rings but they are all connected. We have experienced great joy such as graduating high school, graduation college, getting our first real jobs, quiting our first real jobs, meeting "the one", ok maybe he/she wasn't "the one", meeting the ONE, attending and being in each others weddings, sharing the joy of the first baby, the second baby. Along with the great joys come the great sorrows like being laid off, divorces from the ONE, custody battles, diagnosis of diseases, death and suicide. We have been through these life events together. Along with the celebrations come the defeat but we are there to join in, not matter what the circumstance.
I am not saying new people aren't accepted into this pool of friends but the love and respect we have among each other allows us to have a break in those rings for others to be a part of something so beautiful. I hope non of this sounds strange but friendship like the ones I am talking about are hard to explain. There is a quote I heard a long time ago and I can't remember who said it but it is "People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime." I truly believe this to be true. I am just blessed that the people in my life are here for a lifetime.
Waiting
First I will say that it is exciting to have 4 followers lol. If you guys have blogs let me know. I am new to this so not exactly sure how everything works.
This morning I am waiting. I am waiting for a healthcare company to deliver my new nebulizer. It is exhausting being so sick. I feel like I have been ill for so long and I just want to feel better. I also have to wait for the Direct TV guys which would have to be it's own post but for now I wait.
For a diabetic, exercise is very important and I have thrown out a lot of excuses for not doing it but I guarantee you that I cannot breath very well and I even have doctor's orders not to exercise. I have to get me breathing right before I do anything and it has now become frustration. So many things going on can get someone down. But I am not going to work today, thanks to my understand boss, and I am going to try and get some rest...oh wait.....I have to wait on others and not sleep. I write all this while a 13 week old puppy is losing his mind in the other room. Ah relaxation.
This morning I am waiting. I am waiting for a healthcare company to deliver my new nebulizer. It is exhausting being so sick. I feel like I have been ill for so long and I just want to feel better. I also have to wait for the Direct TV guys which would have to be it's own post but for now I wait.
For a diabetic, exercise is very important and I have thrown out a lot of excuses for not doing it but I guarantee you that I cannot breath very well and I even have doctor's orders not to exercise. I have to get me breathing right before I do anything and it has now become frustration. So many things going on can get someone down. But I am not going to work today, thanks to my understand boss, and I am going to try and get some rest...oh wait.....I have to wait on others and not sleep. I write all this while a 13 week old puppy is losing his mind in the other room. Ah relaxation.
Monday, January 24, 2011
I'm hungry
So I have decided to start a blog because sometimes I have a lot of things on my mind and I figured I might as well write about them. I am an english instructor so I have decided to make writing a part of my daily life.
Tonight, I am hungry. I am diabetic and I am hungry. Today is the day I started eating like the diabetic I am and it's hard. I love food, I love sweets, I love all the things I am not supposed to. So today, I am hungry. I just turned 36 on Saturday. I have stuggled with my weight since I was a teenage and all that fat has caught up with me. I am 36 and I have diabetes. I do not blame anyone but myself. I have been borderline diabetic for years and never seriously did anything about it so now...I'm hungry.
It all started with insulin resistance and then polycystic ovarian syndrome and now diabetes. Sooooo, what is one to do? I HAVE TO WAKE UP!!!! I know exactly what I am supposed to do. I can tell you everything that I need to change but words aren't gonna work this time. As an english instructor I understand the power of words and persuasion but in my case, words mean nothing. So today I am hungry.
I have ventured into the world of online recipes for diabetics and have been overwhelmed with it all. I know how many grams of carbs I am supposed to have at each meal and how many carbs are allowed for each snack and believe me, a big ass bowl of ice cream does not fit into that plan. I need to stick to this just like I need to stick my fingers several times a day to check my blood sugar now.
My husband and I want to try and have at least one baby and we have a lot working against us BUT I know in my heart that I need to do what is within my power to be healthy to not only conceive but carry a baby to term. I am the one who has to come to terms with this disease that I have invited into my body. I am the one who needs to reverse the diagnosis. I am the one who needs to be hungry.
Tonight, I am hungry. I am diabetic and I am hungry. Today is the day I started eating like the diabetic I am and it's hard. I love food, I love sweets, I love all the things I am not supposed to. So today, I am hungry. I just turned 36 on Saturday. I have stuggled with my weight since I was a teenage and all that fat has caught up with me. I am 36 and I have diabetes. I do not blame anyone but myself. I have been borderline diabetic for years and never seriously did anything about it so now...I'm hungry.
It all started with insulin resistance and then polycystic ovarian syndrome and now diabetes. Sooooo, what is one to do? I HAVE TO WAKE UP!!!! I know exactly what I am supposed to do. I can tell you everything that I need to change but words aren't gonna work this time. As an english instructor I understand the power of words and persuasion but in my case, words mean nothing. So today I am hungry.
I have ventured into the world of online recipes for diabetics and have been overwhelmed with it all. I know how many grams of carbs I am supposed to have at each meal and how many carbs are allowed for each snack and believe me, a big ass bowl of ice cream does not fit into that plan. I need to stick to this just like I need to stick my fingers several times a day to check my blood sugar now.
My husband and I want to try and have at least one baby and we have a lot working against us BUT I know in my heart that I need to do what is within my power to be healthy to not only conceive but carry a baby to term. I am the one who has to come to terms with this disease that I have invited into my body. I am the one who needs to reverse the diagnosis. I am the one who needs to be hungry.
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